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ARETHA FRANKLIN: Suing Over Satire

Apr 17, 2014 -- 6:19pm

Aretha Franklin isn't laughing about an Internet put-on claiming she had a brawl with Patti Labelle. In fact, she's filing a multi-million dollar lawsuit over it.

The Queen of Soul wants the News Nerd site, which is filled with satirical articles, to fork over $10 million for a joke item saying she had her fellow diva arrested for assault and battery after she attacked Franklin with “a Mayweather style right and left” at a concert in Atlanta.

Franklin's rep tells the Detroit News, "The story was not presented as satire or humor. It was presented as a serious news story intended to depict me in a slanderous and derogatory way — defamation of character."

For the record, every page on the site carries a warning: "The stories posted on The News Nerd are for entertainment purposes only. The stories may mimic articles found in the headlines, but rest assured they are purely satirical."

CHRIST BEARER: Still Here, But Johnson Is Gone Forever

Apr 17, 2014 -- 6:17pm

Christ Bearer, a Wu-Tang affiliated rapper who cut off his penis and jumped from his second-floor apartment building late Tuesday night, remains in stable condition and will not be able to have his member reattached. 

Police believe Christ Bearer, whose real name is Andre Johnson, might have attempted suicide and is suffering from mental issues. Johnson is a member of Northstar, a group founded by RZA.

THINGS MEN WILL NEVER UNDERSTAND ABOUT WOMEN

Apr 15, 2014 -- 7:31pm

Mostly out of self-preservation, guys do their best to understand their wife or girlfriend.

But it becomes clear very quickly that there are some things about women that just don’t make sense.

Here are some things about women that guys will just never understand:

  • It takes women six months to choose a haircut. Bridges are built in less time.
       
  • Trying on everything, every size, every style, every time … C’mon ladies, life is too short for this.
      
  • How is going to the bathroom a social activity?
      
  • Throw pillows. They’re piles of pillows that aren’t even used.
      
  • Romantic comedies are cheesy and predictable – yet they’re still beloved by women everywhere.
      
  • Shoe hoarding, which leads to skirt hoarding, which leads to blouse hoarding.

2CHAINZ: Reveals Release Date and Cover for Latest Project

Apr 15, 2014 -- 7:26pm

2Chainz has finally revealed the release date and cover art of his forthcoming “fan-oriented” EP titled Freebase. It's due on May 5th and the five-track EP's cover was chosen from artwork suggested by fans on Instagram. The winning photo, chosen from more than 10,000 entries, is a picture of Richard Pryor with two chains around his neck.

Before the Atlanta rapper releases the follow-up to his most recent studio album, 2Chainz wanted to make and dedicate something to his fans. He says, “It has been a minute since the release of my album B.O.A.T.S. II: Me Time, and I wanted to give something special to my fans while I record my follow-up album. This is a taste of what is to come, and is most importantly, for them.”

2Chainz Freebase 0415 CI

HOT MESS OF THE DAY: Drake is wifey material.

Apr 09, 2014 -- 6:14pm

HOT MESS Drake 0409 CI

SURVEY: A Little Romance

Apr 09, 2014 -- 6:09pm

Askmen.com's Great Male Survey asked guys to name something they thought was romantic to do for a partner. 

The question: "What Do You Consider to be a Romantic Gesture (From You to Her)?"

The results:

  • Taking her away on a surprise trip − 36%
  • Buying her a gift, like flowers − 34%
  • Just being there for her −21%
  • Taking care of her usual chores − 9%
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